A Falling Star

Tonight I saw a falling star. I wished for happiness for all.

Peace and Happiness

Peace and happiness will come and go and return. I was quite amazed how at 12pm today I was feeling so good. Deeply inhaling the energising clean ocean air as I returned to harbour in my dinghy after a successful morning of fishing. By early evening my pleasant world was rattled after visiting my previous neighbour next door to the house I own with my ex wife. A druggie was watering the dead lawn I had once carefully levelled and made green. He incoherently expressed his dismay that his girlfriend (my ex wife) had been hiding out for the last few days. He told me not to worry about the house his mate will look after it. It shouldn't burn down. Luckily I do not need the material possessions I have earned in what seems like a previous life to be happy. I just need the ocean air and for my kids to be safe. Peace and happiness returns.

The Childrens Ward

I am watching a documentry about victims of landmines. I will try to appreciate my life much more.

Can't Sleep

I can't sleep because I am pissed off and that is making more pissed off. I had a belief that when you are pissed off it is actually derived from being pissed off about a failing in yourself incorrectly directed to some other external event.

I have also viewed anger as a negative emotion that should be ignored and replaced with a positive emotion. I have also rationalised the situation like "at least you have your health........ it could be much worse ....etc".

But fuck, there are simply evil, stupid, selfish people in this world that its seems justifiable to hate. I am also pissed off that they can invade my mind with negative thoughts of anger and hatred. Also there are terrible injustices in this world that justify anger.

I know these feelings will pass but I want them to pass more quickly. I am hoping that expressing them on this blog will help them pass more quickly and allow me to sleep and return to my normally pleasant and interesting dreams.